If you are dating and looking for a mate, that task is more difficult if you don’t know who you are.
If you don’t have a solid self-identity, how can you find someone who is compatible with you?
Identity comes from your own history, memory and how you know and remember events in your own life.
When you have an identity, you keep it intact by knowing right from wrong, especially as it reinforces your own personal boundaries. This means you stay away from people, events and places where things are happening that don’t agree with who you are.
Another way to bolster and display your identity is by voicing values. If you sit idly by while you witness bad things happening either in person or on TV, you are a party to that violation of your own identity. Life is not a passive event. It needs your active participation if you are to advance yourself and bolster your identity.
You can also strengthen your identity through individual contemplation, ritual worship and prayer. These religious or spiritual actions should reflect your own history and help you remember important events from your own lifetime.
When you have your own history, memory and identity established, you will be more confident in whom you are and be in a better position to find someone who compliments who you know you are. Only then will you know who you really are.
There is more on this topic in the book, You Don’t Think I’m Beautiful, available on Amazon.